Rum continued....

I guess I need to clear up my purpose writing my blog "What a bottle of rum can do for you." The point is to show what God was doing with me in that instance and share the experience to show God's heart. I experienced an openness I realized I could have with God ALL the time. It is an openness that I knew at that time and know now is that I can have with God everyday. God wants that with me.

Am I going to get drunk to get that? No

Am I going to drink even a little alcohol to get there? No

I believe when I wrote that blog, first, I was in my right mind. I knew that what I wrote and what I did at that time I would not regret it later. And looking back on it I do not regret what I said or did.

My purpose with my blogs is to share my experiences so that hopefully someone somewhere sometime can get something to help them with their walk with God. Is everything I say nice and comfortable? I hope not. When life sucks where do you escape to? A lot of people use the internet. It's safe. When you want answers or just to know that someone is experiencing something you are experiencing, what do you do? If I feel too uncomfortable to talk to someone to find out if they can give me answers I go to the internet. I like to read peoples' blogs.

Matt Drake talks about somethings that I think "You can't be writing those things. Someone will get the wrong idea!" But then when I take a step back I realize I love reading his blogs anyway.

Why?

Because he's being honest. He's being transparent and I like that and want that in myself. And he's asking the same things I've asked. Thought the same things I've thought. I want to hopefully come along side people in this way, but then direct them towards God. Give them some hope that someone can feel what they are feeling and get out of it and get some answers.

I love the response of this blog. I've had more people talk to me about this one blog entry than any other. But it's cool to see that the people who are talking to me love me. They care about me. They see where alcohol, or any substance, has taken people and they don't want me to go there. And that is awesome! I love that you guys are that concerned about me. Thank you for loving me enough to confront me.

I love experiencing things with God and then sharing it with people. Not so that people can say "How nice for you" or "oh you are so holy" but I want people to be encouraged by what God is doing for me and then they would want that for themselves and ask God for it.God want you to live like I lived the other night. Not by alcohol but by being free to worship him without thinking how ridiculous you look. To talk to him without hearing the lies that you "oh you are being petty. Oh you shouldn't get so upset about something like that."

NOOOO!!!

He wants you to live with freedom and go to him with confidence that you can say what you want and be honest with your heart and show him your brokenness.

Should you use alcohol or any substance to get you there? That is not my position to say. Only God can answer that for you. My thought on it is that God wants you to willingly come to him and be honest with him. If that means you use something like alcohol or something to get you comfortable enough to do that, then that is wrong. God gave us our will for a reason. Otherwise he'd just let us move the chemicals in our bodies around so that we would come to him. That's not your will. You are not choosing him. You are not coming to him in faith or with trusting him.

God used this experience to show me what is possible for me and him. And he has shown this to me when I was on spiritual highs too. He also showed me when I was completely broken. Not hanging onto anything. So has God showed me this before alcohol?? Yes! This is just a reminder.

And the cool thing is that God kept me safe through the whole experience. He kept my mind right and he kept outside things from taking advantage of the state I was in. I am very grateful.

When Paul is writing his letter to the Corinthians he talks about food offered to idols and some peopled believed that if the food was given to idols then it was a sin to eat it. Like it was unclean. But Paul said in 1 Corinthians 10:30 "If I take part in the meal with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for? So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God."

But it also continues to say "Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved."

So is this licence to drink? If that's what you're going for. No. But everything God made with a purpose and we are to be thankful for it. But like it says if it causes someone to stumble, if it hurts someone's faith then it is not good. And I care about how this affects people's walk with God more than doing something that I have been given freedom to enjoy. This is not entitlement. If this hurts someone's faith then it is not right for me to do this. But I am going to acknowledge the freedom we have and share about that freedom. Not in a "in your face I'm right, you're wrong" but "hey we've been given a freedom to enjoy what God made and he wants you to see a part of him with everything he's made. He designs with a purpose."

Our eyes have to stay on him and his purpose. Sometimes he wants us to take part in a pleasure he's made for us, sometimes he doesn't want you to because it will hurt someone, and sometimes he doesn't let you because you can't handle at this point.

My point: seek God. I am. And he's teaching me new things every day. What people say is right or wrong is not the ultimate authority. God is and we need to see what he says. He gave a wonderful book for us so that we can see his heart for us.

I like the feedback. Keep it up. I'm going to reply to comments from now on. Sorry for not doing it so much in the past.